Public Speaking 101

By Chris Vacca

Stage 1 - Before I open my mouth anxiety..almost to the point of dread...but an underlying curiosity...how will I perform?...what if I'm fluent?...miracles?...no chance...reality sets in...anxiety grows...hands becoming moist...speech is memorized...feel a beating lump in my throat...act calm...don't embarrass yourself...just get it over with...however it goes...just get it over with...should've taken the easy way out...professor pulled me aside...asked if I wanted to hand in my report...no oral...can't accept offer...a little insulted...don't treat me differently...I'll get through it...one way or another...I'm up next...breathing quicker...chest about to explode...feel throat tighten...why am I sweating?...I know everyone in the class...they're no better, no worse than I am...relax...act calm...I'm up...all eyes on me...relax...walk to front of room...face audience...smile...can't back out now...fell a block coming...let 'er rip.

Stage 2 - The Presentation sound really bad...breathing is awful...what did I just say?...trying to plow through each block...can't even understand myself...should stop & pause...but I don't...sweat dripping down my back...look at these people's faces...looks like they're in pain...a little humorous...that was a good sentence...relax...almost over...been up here 10 minutes...should've been done in 5...desperately need therapy...last sentence...push through the block...out of breath...done...any questions? ..no?...not surprised...I got a question...what the hell did I just say?...just sit down.

Stage3 - The Aftermath it's over...thank God...feel surprisingly good...and melancholic...sweat is beginning to dry...everyone looks shell-shocked ...professor thanks me for my interesting report...yeah, sure...still calming down...breathing returning to normal...hey, I did it!...faced my worst fear...can't get any worse...only if my parents were here...friend makes a comment(sarcastic)..."great report"...I gotta laugh...ease the mood ...everyone relaxes...who's next?...class over...professor wants to see me...I know the drill...just wanted to remark on your show of courage...I politely smile & say thanks...what did you expect?...there was never a choice... everyone has got something...no better, no worse...next class.